Writing Book 4 · Lesson 13

Subordinate one idea

Two related ideas can be joined so one clearly depends on the other.

What it is

When two sentences sit side by side, they look equally important. Often one is really the setting for the other. Putting when, after, or because in front of the lesser idea turns it into a clause that cannot stand alone — which is exactly the point. It now leans on the main idea, and the reader knows which one matters.

Watch it built

1
Two sentences of apparently equal weight.
The rain fell. The river rose.
2
Decide which is the main event, and which is only the setting.
The river rising is the event. The rain is the setting.
3
Put when in front of the setting, and a comma after it.
When the rain fell, the river rose.

One more

The bell rang. The class stood up.
When the bell rang, the class stood up.
Remember
The lesser idea gets when / after / because in front of it.
Ask yourself: “Which of my two ideas is the main one?”

Remember

One idea leads, the other follows.

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